The New Lawyer and the Partnership of Love

Learning from the Work of Gianpiero Petriglieri

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Leaders, by definition, must have followers. In law firm partnerships, however, it is too simplistic to talk in terms of leaders and followers. Many lawyers have no ambition to become leaders (a.k.a. managing partners), and they are reluctant to view themselves as followers.

In such a context where authority is contingent and power is contested, leadership is—as Laura Empson has suggested—a matter of guiding, nudging, and persuading. Manfred Kets de Vries, a renowned scholar of leadership, phrases it this way: “Leaders inspire people to move beyond personal egoistic motives—to transcend themselves.”

So what can the leaders of law firms do with the highly driven, highly demanding, and sometimes highly insecure prima donnas for whom they are responsible?

Gianpiero Petriglieri, professor at INSEAD and an expert in organizational behaviour, offers a bold redefinition of leadership: Leadership as a kind of love.

From “Leadership is a Kind of Love” on YouTube.

I sense that some inner skeptics may be dropping in. That is okay and not surprising! In fact, the personality research on lawyers by Larry Richardson has found that we lawyers tend to be skeptical. Or as lawyer psychologist Susan Daicoff explains in Lawyer, Know Thyself: A Psychological Analysis of Strengths and Weaknesses, lawyers are disproportionately more ‘thinking’ and less ‘feeling’ than the general population. According to Daicoff, the majority of lawyers are introverted, intuitive, evaluative, performance-oriented, with an emphasis on rights and responsibilities over feelings and relationships, and with high stress levels.

So, if you are skeptical about this concept of “leadership as a kind of love”, don’t worry. Your skepticism might be what makes you a great lawyer. However, as Anne Brafford, founder of Aspire, points out in Positive Professionals: Creating High Performing Profitable Firms Through the Science of Engagement, this trait can hinder the development of trusting relationships. So let me ask you:

Have you experienced good leadership?

If so, how did you know that it was “good leadership”?

As Petriglieri points out, it is likely that you did not think of a person’s position or title and most likely you did not go through a checklist of skills. Instead, you probably felt something, a shift, you were confused and things became clear, you felt scared and became calm, you were bored and became excited.

So if leadership is not based on an objective model with factual criteria, does it exist at all?

In his entertaining and wise video, Petriglieri draws a parallel to another aspect in our lives where we feel it when it’s there. And this phenomenon is love.

When we think of love, we think of a person, not of a model. We care for our loved ones, we make sacrifices, we give and we receive love, we know when it’s there, when it is real and when someone shows it.

With leadership—as Petriglieri points out—it is exactly the same. We know it when it is there, when someone acts and shows it and moves you. As he stresses, it is not like love but it is a kind of love!

It should be added that Petriglieri’s recent revitalization of the the ‘leadership as love’ concept is not without its precedents. John Hope Bryant’s 2009 book Love Leadership: The New Way to Lead in a Fear-Based World, as well as Mark Rittenburg’s research and most notably his 2017 TEDx Talk “Leadership is Love: The Power of Human Connections” are among the examples of previous work that speak to the powerful of this concept.

So why is this relevant for law firm leaders?

For leaders in global law firms, adopting this concept of leadership can be revolutionary. In an environment often criticized for its lack of empathy and support, embracing leadership as a form of love means prioritizing the mental and emotional health of the team. It involves creating a culture where people feel valued, understood, and supported, not just as professionals but as humans. This approach not only addresses the mental health crisis in the legal profession that has been analyzed by Professor Jarrod Reich and others, but also enhances team cohesion, loyalty, and overall performance.

Fostering a Human Culture in High-Performance Environments

Implementing this leadership style in high-performing law firms requires a paradigm shift. It means moving away from a solely results-driven focus to one that equally values human connection and emotional intelligence. Imagine, you as a leader cultivate an environment where vulnerability is not seen as a weakness but as a strength, where open conversations about challenges and well-being are encouraged, and where professional growth is balanced with personal care. This human-centric culture can transform the workplace, making it not only a place of excellence but also a source of personal fulfillment and resilience.

What can you do?

Leadership as a kind of love emphasizes the importance of creating environments where legal professionals feel valued, understood, and supported. Partners in law firms can manifest this by:

• Encouraging Open Communication: Creating safe spaces for lawyers to share their concerns, ideas, and aspirations without fear of judgment or retribution.

• Promoting Work-Life Balance: Acknowledging the rigorous demands of the legal profession and implement policies that allow for flexibility, wellness, and personal time.

• Investing in Relationships: Ask yourself, what do I care about? Whose future do I care for? Value each team member's contributions, fostering a culture of mentorship.

The Paradigm Shift from Passion to Care

While passion is often heralded as the engine of success, Petriglieri suggests that care—defined by generosity, attention to others' needs, and a commitment to their future—is more sustainable and impactful. For law firm partners, shifting from a numbers-centric to a care-centric model involves deep introspection about whom they serve (clients, colleagues, the broader community) and how they can contribute to their well-being and success.

Incorporating the concept of leadership as a kind of love into the partnership model of global law firms represents a bold, yet essential, evolution. By redefining leadership as a relationship built on care, law firms can create environments where lawyers feel empowered, engaged, and aligned with their firm's ethical and professional standards. This transformation not only enhances the well-being of individuals within the firm but also contributes to the firm's reputation in attracting and retaining talent, client satisfaction (only healthy lawyers are good lawyers), and overall success.

Embracing leadership as a form of love is not merely a philosophical shift; it is a practical strategy for building more resilient, cohesive, and ethically minded organizations. As legal professionals navigate the complexities of global practice, the principles of love—caring for others, fostering safety and freedom, and prioritizing collective over individual success—offer a compass for cultivating leadership that is both humane and effective.

Ultimately, embracing leadership as an act of love might be the paradigm shift that modern law practices need, paving the way for environments where lawyers not only excel in their careers but also find a sense of belonging and purpose in their work.

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Sources

Bryant, J. H., & George, B. (2009). Love Leadership: The New Way to Lead in a Fear-Based World. Hoboken, New Jersey: Jossey-Bass.

Empson, L. (2017). Leading Professionals: Power, Politics, and Prima Donnas. London: Oxford University Press.

Kets de Vries, M. and K. Balazs (2011). “The shadow side of leadership”. In The SAGE Handbook of Leadership, ed. A. Bryman, D.L. Collinson, K. Grint, B. Jackson, and M. Uhl-Bien. London: SAGE Publications, 380-92.

Petriglieri, G. (2024). “Leadership is a Kind of Love”, retrieved from

Reich, J. F. (2020). Capitalizing on Healthy Lawyers: The Business Case for Law Firms to Promote and Prioritize Lawyer Well-Being, 65 Vill. L. Rev. 361.

Richard, L. (2002). Herding cats: The lawyer personality revealed. Altman Weil Report to Legal Management, 29, 1-12.

Rittenburg, M. (2017). “Leadership is Love: The Power of Human Connections” Retrieved from:

Daicoff, S. (2004). Lawyer, know thyself: A psychological analysis of personality strengths and weaknesses. In American Psychological Association eBooks. https://doi.org/10.1037/10751-000

Brafford, A. (2017), Positive Professionals: Creating High-Performing Profitable Firms Through the Science of Engagement.