The Power of Unlikely Friendships
Fostering Camaraderie in the Workplace—Lessons from Gilgamesh and Enkidu
We often hear the terms, work husband, work wife, or work bestie.
These terms have been coined by the zeitgeist to describe relationships that have flourished at the workplace. I can think of a few work husbands and besties that I have had over the years that have carried me through many tough times as well as some joyous ones. It is widely known that social dynamics and workplace performance go hand in hand. In Gallup’s famous employee’s engagement surveys, one of the pivotal questions asks respondents whether they “have a best friend at work” (Burkus, 2017).
On the other end of the spectrum, there is the work rival; the archnemesis. The person at work that makes your day to day a living hell. Often side stepping you and doing their best to bring you down, most often in the name of competitiveness and feeling threatened, albeit unconsciously.
From Adversaries to Friends
As detailed in my previous article In the Footsteps of Gilgamesh, the relationship between the eponymous hero Gilgamesh and his erstwhile adversary Enkidu transformed them from being fierce enemies to becoming the poster boys of a budding bromance, their bond eventually evolving into a profound friendship, demonstrating the potential for reconciliation and growth even in the most unlikely of circumstances.
Which leads me to the topic of this third article in the Gilgamesh series. The importance of camaraderie and how to nourish it in the organizational setting, offering insights and practical strategies for promoting healthy relationships to achieve organizational success—from the heart of the oldest story ever told.
Why is Camaraderie Important
First let us examine why camaraderie is important in the workplace. And what the lack of it does to the organizational setting.
At its core, camaraderie in the workplace fosters a sense of belonging and mutual support among employees. Research suggests that strong social connections developed in an emotional culture of compassion and love at work lead to greater job satisfaction, increased morale, and enhanced productivity (Barsade & O'Neill, 2014). Camaraderie also serves as a buffer against workplace stress and burnout, providing individuals with a sense of emotional resilience in the face of adversity.
On the flip side, the lack of camaraderie in the workplace can have detrimental effects on organizational dynamics and individual well-being. Research indicates that employees who feel isolated or disconnected from their colleagues are more likely to experience feelings of alienation, disengagement, and dissatisfaction with their jobs. Furthermore, a lack of social support at work has been associated with increased rates of absenteeism, turnover, and decreased organizational commitment. The absence of camaraderie can also breed toxicity, fueling unnecessary interpersonal conflicts and undermining team cohesion (Felps et al., 2009).
Just as Gilgamesh and Enkidu found strength and support in each other, so too can modern workplaces benefit from fostering strong bonds among colleagues. Like Gilgamesh and Enkidu, who faced formidable challenges together and emerged stronger as a result, teams that cultivate camaraderie can overcome obstacles with greater resilience and achieve collective success.
Understanding Camaraderie: Exploring the Role of Attachment
Attachment styles, deeply ingrained from early childhood experiences, play a significant role in shaping interpersonal dynamics within the workplace, drawing on psychodynamic principles. Research suggests that individuals with secure attachment styles tend to form trusting and supportive relationships with colleagues, fostering collaboration and cooperation (Mikulincer & Shaver, 2007). Conversely, those with anxious or avoidant attachment patterns may exhibit maladaptive behaviors in interpersonal interactions, such as excessive dependency or emotional distancing. These attachment patterns can manifest in friendships and conflicts among colleagues, influencing communication styles, conflict resolution strategies, and overall team dynamics.
Drawing parallels with the Epic of Gilgamesh, where the bond between Gilgamesh and Enkidu transcends personal insecurities and vulnerabilities, we can see how attachment styles shape interpersonal dynamics. Just as individuals with secure attachments form trusting relationships, so too did Gilgamesh and Enkidu rely on each other for support and companionship. Conversely, the anxieties and insecurities of avoidant individuals mirror the challenges faced by Gilgamesh and Enkidu as they navigated their evolving friendship.
How to Foster Camaraderie
It’s a simple recipe. Just two main ingredients are needed: trust and psychological safety. But how do we build these intangible assets? It’s a recipe that requires a seasoned chef.
From a psychodynamic perspective, trust and psychological safety are rooted in individuals' unconscious perceptions of their interpersonal relationships and the organizational environment (Edmondson, 1999). Trust emerges when individuals feel secure in their interactions with others, especially from their direct leaders (supervisors), and believe that their colleagues have their best interests at heart (Dirks & Ferrin, 2002). Similarly, psychological safety refers to the extent to which individuals feel comfortable expressing themselves and taking interpersonal risks without fear of judgment or reprisal (Edmondson, 1999). To cultivate trust and psychological safety, leaders must demonstrate authenticity, empathy, and integrity in their interactions with employees. Additionally, creating opportunities for open communication, collaboration, and shared decision-making can reinforce feelings of trust and psychological safety within the organization (Kahn, 1990).
Leaders can lay the groundwork for fostering camaraderie and building cohesive, high-performing teams through prioritizing trust and psychological safety as foundational elements of organizational culture.
Reflecting back on the Epic of Gilgamesh, where trust and psychological safety between Gilgamesh and Enkidu paved the way for their deep friendship, we see the importance of these elements in fostering camaraderie. Just as their bond grew stronger through mutual respect and understanding, so too can workplace relationships flourish in an environment of trust and psychological safety. In this way, leaders can cultivate cohesive, high-performing teams and foster a sense of camaraderie among employees, mirroring the transformative power of friendship depicted in the epic.
Navigating Workplace Rivalries: How to Transform a Foe into a Friend?
How do you bring your workplace Enkidus’ to your side?
Workplace rivalries and conflicts are pervasive phenomena that can disrupt organizational harmony and hinder individual and team performance. Ranging from subtle power struggles to full blown overt competition, the dynamics of rivalry are deeply rooted in unconscious desires and motivations including envy, insecurity, and the quest for validation (Freud, 1922).
Adler's theory of individual psychology emphasizes the role of inferiority feelings and the pursuit of superiority as driving forces behind human behavior (Adler, 1927). In the workplace context, individuals may engage in rivalry as a means of compensating for perceived inadequacies or asserting dominance within the organizational hierarchy.
Managing Conflicts and Fostering Constructive Relationships
Effective conflict management is essential for transforming workplace rivalries into opportunities for growth and collaboration. One strategy involves promoting open communication and dialogue among conflicting parties, allowing them to express their grievances and concerns in a constructive manner. Additionally, fostering a culture of empathy and understanding can help individuals recognize and empathize with the perspectives of their rivals, leading to greater mutual respect and cooperation. Furthermore, encouraging collaborative problem-solving and goal-setting can shift the focus from competition to shared objectives, cultivating a sense of camaraderie and teamwork (Dyer & Dyer, 2013).
Strategies for Creating a Culture of Camaraderie
Nurturing camaraderie in the workplace requires intentional effort and strategic initiatives. Organizations can cultivate a culture of camaraderie by encouraging social interactions, fostering mentorship programs, and promoting team-building activities. Additionally, leaders play a pivotal role in modeling supportive behaviors and fostering an inclusive work environment where individuals feel valued and respected (Barsade & Gibson, 2007).
In the Epic of Gilgamesh, the transformation of an adversarial relationship into a profound friendship is an ode to the power of collaboration and mutual respect. Just as Gilgamesh and Enkidu overcame their differences to achieve greatness together, modern workplaces can sow the seeds of camaraderie and collaboration, ultimately leading to greater success and fulfillment for all.
Cultivating Collaborative Relationships at the Executive Level
Understanding CEO Isolation
At the pinnacle of organizational hierarchy, CEOs often find themselves grappling with the pressures of leadership, which can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation. The need to maintain professional boundaries and uphold the perception of authority further exacerbates this sense of detachment from others within the organization (Kets de Vries, 1999). However, the isolation experienced by CEOs is not insurmountable, and strategic initiatives can be undertaken to create connections with colleagues who offer valuable insights and perspectives. Afterall, everybody needs a friend.
One strategy for overcoming CEO isolation is to surround oneself with a diverse team of individuals who possess complementary skills and expertise. By hiring employees who are smarter and more knowledgeable in certain domains, CEOs can create a culture of collaboration and innovation within the organization. Additionally, forming partnerships with colleagues who possess complementary skills and expertise that serve as mentors and advisors can provide CEOs with invaluable guidance and support (Kram, 1985), albeit cultivated in an environment of psychological safety, where individuals feel comfortable expressing their ideas and opinions (Edmondson, 1999).
The Paradox of Workplace Camaraderie: Balancing Benefits and Costs
The influence of workplace camaraderie on organizational dynamics presents a complex interplay of benefits and costs. While camaraderie fosters a sense of belonging and mutual support among employees, it also carries inherent risks that warrant careful consideration.
Utilizing social identity theory as a theoretical framework, recent research has shed light on the nuanced relationship between camaraderie and workplace incivility, revealing that workplace camaraderie significantly impacts incivility mediated by personal biases, cronyism and favoritism (Burhan & Malek, 2024).
A study featured in the Harvard Business Review highlighted that the benefits of workplace friendship must be weighed against its potential costs. The study found that workplace friendships can lead to distractions, emotional exhaustion, and increased stress levels, particularly when navigating competitive environments and career advancement opportunities (Burkus, 2017). The emotional toll of maintaining friendships at work can detract from individual performance and well-being, posing challenges for both employees and organizations alike. This can be likened to Gilgamesh and Enkidu’s addiction to adrenaline-infused adventures, without considering the dire consequences of their actions, that eventually resulted in Enkidu’s death.
Nevertheless, despite the associated costs, the positive gains from workplace friendships often outweigh the negatives. Research suggests that employees with close relationships at work tend to be more productive, engaged, and satisfied with their jobs (Burkus, 2017). Moreover, camaraderie fosters collaboration, creativity, and teamwork, enhancing organizational cohesion and resilience in the face of challenges (Barsade & Gibson, 2007).
The perils of workplace camaraderie underscore the need for organizations to strike a delicate balance between fostering supportive relationships and managing the potential risks.
Camaraderie’s Contribution to Self-Development
Have you heard of the five people theory?
It stipulates that the five people you spend the most time with will shape who you are, as highlighted by motivational speaker Jim Rohn (Groth, 2012). This remains debatable (Burkus, 2024), but it leaves us with the notion that it is imperative that we choose our friends wisely.
As adversaries, Gilgamesh and Enkidu represented opposing forces—Gilgamesh, the epitome of power and arrogance, and Enkidu, a wild and untamed counterpart. But through their epic battle, they found a way to respect each other’s power and abilities and became the best of friends. There was a mutual respect along with a recognition and an appreciation of each other’s abilities.
After which, through their shared experiences and mutual understanding, Gilgamesh and Enkidu went on a wild adventure that laid the groundwork for self-discovery and emotional growth for both of them. We can theorize that their encounters with Humbaba and the Bull of Heaven serve as symbolic battles against their own inner demons, leading to a deeper sense of camaraderie and emotional bonding through shared experience, once they slaughtered these demons together (Freud, 1923).
Moreover, Enkidu's sacrificial death catalyzes Gilgamesh's existential crisis, prompting him to confront his mortality and redefine his sense of purpose, a topic I will be exploring in the upcoming articles.
Ultimately, the evolution of Gilgamesh and Enkidu's friendship underscores the transformative power of interpersonal relationships in shaping individual identity and self-development and growth.
The Power of Friendships
The power of camaraderie in the workplace cannot be overstated. From enhancing employee well-being to bolstering organizational performance, fostering strong interpersonal connections is essential for creating a thriving work environment. Therefore it is vital that organizations embrace strategies that nurture camaraderie to cultivate a culture of collaboration, resilience, and success.
So, as you reflect on the significance of workplace friendships, take this as an opportunity to express your gratitude to your work bestie. Because let's face it, navigating the office jungle is a lot more fun when you've got a partner in crime to share the coffee breaks, mutual hate for the printer that never works and the “Is it Friday yet?” moments.
Afterthoughts: Self Reflection
1. Have you experienced the dynamics of workplace friendships and rivalries in your own career? How have they impacted your work environment and personal well-being?
2. Reflecting on the article's exploration of attachment styles and their influence on workplace relationships, what attachment style do you identify with? How does it manifest in your interactions with colleagues?
3. Consider the strategies outlined for fostering camaraderie in the workplace. Which approaches resonate with you, and how might you implement them within your own team or organization?
4. Workplace camaraderie can bring both benefits and costs, as highlighted in the article. How do you navigate the balance between fostering supportive relationships and managing potential risks in your professional life?
5. Reflecting on the transformative power of friendships illustrated by the story of Gilgamesh and Enkidu, how have your own interpersonal relationships shaped your identity and personal growth in the workplace?
6. Finally, in light of the article's insights, take a moment to appreciate and express gratitude for your own work bestie or trusted colleagues. How do these relationships contribute to your enjoyment and success in the workplace?
Sources
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Barsade, S. G., & Gibson, D. E. (2007). Why Does Affect Matter in Organizations? Academy of Management Perspectives, 21(1), 36-59.
Barsade, S. G., & O'Neill, O. A. (2014). What's Love Got to Do With It? A Longitudinal Study of the Culture of Companionate Love and Employee and Client Outcomes in A Long-Term Care Setting. Administrative Science Quarterly, 59(4), 551-598.
Burhan, Q., & Malik, M. F. (2024). Concept of Workplace Camaraderie: Developing and Testing an Integrated Model Leading to Incivility. International Journal of Conflict Management, 35(3), 453-470.
Burkus, D. (2017). Work Friends Make Us More Productive (Except When They Stress Us Out). Harvard Business Review. https://hbr.org/2017/05/work-friends-make-us-more-productive-except-when-they-stress-us-out
Burkus, D. (2024). You’re NOT the Average of The Five People You Surround Yourself With. Medium. https://medium.com/the-mission/youre-not-the-average-of-the-five-people-you-surround-yourself-with-f21b817f6e69
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 | A guest post by
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Hi Nour, I'm Seth, a NYC-based theatre director and writer and a friend of Hanae Bezad's.
I recently created a 'Gilgamesh' theatre production that tells a beautiful true story of male friendship between two young men, one Iraqi and one American. The actors Ahmed and Jesse play themselves and portray their real life friendship, and show how they overcame cultural, linguistic and religious differences and become best friends and play music together-- a fusion of 'Maqam' and North American jazz. I'd love to share more about the show with you sometime!
We are currently touring the show and would love to bring it to Dubai someday.
More here: https://vimeo.com/872159353